Something is happening to me that is most unsettling.
Perhaps for some of you this isn’t a big deal, but for me, it is on the same scale as the earth turning on its axis about 50 degrees. Unheard of, disastrous, life changing, and scary as a haunted house when I was 10 years old.
I am the ‘never lose anything’ person. The ‘find everything’ person. The ‘dependable person’. The person who was trained at a very young age to ‘find and fetch’, and was really good at doing both.
I headed the family Department of Lost Property That Has Been Found because I was surrounded by people who couldn’t or wouldn’t keep up with their own belongings. I honed my talent as a self-serving exercise, cutting search times to a minimum, and receiving copious amounts of praise for my good works.
But lately, my life has taken a tumble into chaos. Perhaps this wouldn’t be so bad if only I had someone to replace the ‘never lose anything’ me. I could turn to that other me and say, ‘bring my other house shoe that is somewhere in this house’. Or, ‘make sure my purse is not left behind’. But no, I’m venturing into this wasteland of not knowing where I left things all alone without having first trained my replacement.
And I do need a replacement.
I would rest so much easier if I thought this was a sign that I’m busy and my mind is full, or that a burglar is taking selective things just to play with me. I’m not so certain it is either of those things. What is disconcerting is that I lived with family members who were notorious for losing things, leaving things, misplacing things, but they started this pattern at an early age…not at 73.
I find myself looking in the oven, in the microwave, in the refrigerator, and freezer, in the washing machine, outside, inside, searching wastebaskets and shower stalls. Peeking behind doors, digging through drawers…where oh where is that special pillow case? All I know is that it isn’t here and I haven’t taken it somewhere, so?
It is a mystery; in fact it is several mysteries since the list of lost/misplaced/missing items is growing longer by the hour.